Phantaloons

One less taken parking spot at Longhorn.

That’s my secret, Cap, I’m always outdated.

-Lineage User

Ew, Dasani?

puts it back

I’m antipedo, so we’re good.

"FOR THE LAST TIME, I am NOT a-

Now post the eldrich horror version.

We’re not only animals, we’re not even the smartest ones.

Our biggest mistake is thinking the rules of nature apply to all but us. Hubris killed the human.

This round, anyway.

Republican plan (add water):

phone rings

Normal person: “Who?”

Me: “Why?”

…exactly?

You wouldn’t want to mess up your best at a Wendy’s.

Why aren’t ours?